Lex Barrie

@Spitfire

Does anyone else hear a voice screaming, why?

When you’re with a partner or friends, sometimes wonder, how?

Where do I fit?

Why do I keep doubting we have a relationship, when you stand there telling me “I love you”?

Why do I feel like my partner cares more about others than they do about me?

Sometimes I even wonder, I am too boring to be with them?

Why do I keep getting the feeling that I am last on your list of, “things I need to care about”, when you have held my number one spot for 3 weeks straight?

Am I thinking too hard?

Being too sensitive?

Why do I still now, after so long, get anxiety about seeing you?

Even though I know I left you to make the decision to leave me, why am I afraid?

Did I ask for this? Does that not mean it can hurt?

Am I ever going to see that I am hurting and that is okay?

Do I say anything as I see you walk by?

Do I sit by while slowly pushing all my feelings off to one side?

Do I pretend not to care?

Maybe someday I will learn that I can, but are these feelings too hard to face?

Will I learn somehow that maybe I am not top priority but I still matter greatly?

Can I live with that?

Yes.

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