During my meditation this morning I listened to the narrator go on about how we sometimes have an underlining emotion that we didn’t realize we had. Basically, you could wake up in the morning feeling good, then realize that you were actually anxious or frustrated for example. I obviously knew that this was a thing humans realized throughout the day (humans are notorious for changing their minds) but it resonated with me more today than it ever had.
As I was laying down listening, my mind wandered off into several directions. It went one way talking about a friend I hadn’t spoken to in a while and then another way talking about what I should get a completely different friend for Christmas. My mind has a tendency, like most, to fall off the beaten path and discover new trains to catch.
I think in a way though, I became a bit anxious.
As I was trying to keep my mind in one particular place, I realized that I had an underlining feeling of stress and frustration. It wasn’t much, but this was the first time with me using this new meditation app that I started to feel something. I forced myself to stop thinking at once for just a few seconds as the narrators voice ended off another 3 minute session.
I kept my mind clear after that and watched as those underlining feeling faded into the background. It felt rather strange.
I always knew that I had the ability to stress myself out to the point of burying myself in the closet and never coming out. Most humans do. But todays meditation made me realize that I just need to let it all go when I am suppose to be at peace. Thinking about what could happen or what never will happen, doesn’t solve anything.
So watch out for those emotions under the surface of your skin. Whether you realize it or not, they will always catch up to you.